Category: <span>Family Therapy</span>

baggage in relationships
Child Therapy Couples Therapy Family Therapy Individual Therapy Therapy • • • By Robin Newman 0 Comments

How we bring baggage into our relationships.

Emotional baggage is what people often carry into relationships. Simply put, baggage is the collection of unpleasant memories from the past that continue to negatively affect our perception / behavior in the present. How and why do we bring baggage into our relationships from the past?

baggage in relationships - protective behavior

Unmet Needs:

Each of these developmental tasks must be met or we will not feel secure:

Attachment: I’m connected to my caretakers and can depend upon them.

Exploration: I can leave Mom & Dad and come back. I’m not smothered.

Identity I am secure in who I am. I don’t have to be like anyone else.

Competency: I can reach for my dreams and find success without shame.

Lost Parts:

We’re born with four beautiful ways to connect to others:

Thinking: I can have my own ideas.
Sensing: It’s okay to explore my body.
Feeling: I can have feelings that are different from yours.
Acting: I can show my feelings.

A relationship goes through numerous phases during its life cycle, and it’s obvious for it to have a few rough patches. The strength of a relationship is reflected in how couples deal with the rough patches and move ahead.

Long Island couples therapist - getting through hard times
For more info. on relationship counseling, contact Robin Newman, LCSW today.

Robin Newman helps couples break through barriers to achieve greater understanding, connection and intimacy.

(631) 421-4701 therapistlongisland@gmail.com

< Watch Robin Newman on YouTube >

stay in connection - Huntington Relationship Therapy
Child Therapy Couples Therapy Family Therapy Individual Therapy Social Work Therapy • • • • • By Robin Newman 0 Comments

Stay in connection 2020

Stay in connection 2020 – Huntington Relationship Center – Imago Relationship Therapy

Humans are social animals: We crave feeling supported, valued and connected.

Research points to the benefits of social connection: in one compelling study, a key difference between very happy people and less happy people was good relationships.

Communicate to help manage anxiety and stress.

During this time of sheltering in place / being quarantined under the same roof, it’s highly possible that stress, anxiety and depression might start to get the best of us. If it happens to you, know that it’s perfectly normal, especially under these chaotic circumstances.

That’s why it’s so important to stay in connection during these uncertain times. No one should struggle alone. If you find that you could use someone to talk to or you know someone who is in need of assistance, contact the Huntington Relationship Center today.

As a Long Island social worker, Robin welcomes couples, families, and individuals to her office:
148 East Main Street (Suite 102) Huntington, NY 11743.

Long Island couples therapist - getting through hard times

For more info. on counseling, contact Robin Newman, LCSW today.

Robin Newman helps individuals and couples break through barriers to achieve greater understanding, connection and intimacy. (631) 421-4701

< Watch Robin Newman on YouTube >

Heightened Stress in 2020 - Counseling Services for NYers - Robin Newman, LCSW
Child Therapy Couples Therapy Family Therapy Individual Therapy Social Work Therapy • • • • By Robin Newman 0 Comments

Heightened Stress in 2020 – Counseling for NYers

Heightened Stress in 2020 – Counseling Services for NYers – Robin Newman, LCSW

Invest In Your Love

A relationship goes through numerous phases during its life cycle, and it’s obvious for it to have a few rough patches. The strength of a relationship is reflected in how couples deal with the rough patches and move ahead. During these stressful times, counseling can be very helpful.

Surviving Heightened Stress in 2020:

Maintain your emotional support system. If you don’t have any, find a licensed therapist who will be that for you. These are the people you can vent your frustration with and share your successes with.

Talking about what’s happening to you is the best way to defuse your feelings and symptoms. Allow yourself to cry. It releases feelings and tension. Get feedback and advice from a professional NY counselor.

Value and protect yourself. Try to exercise. Exercise releases tension in the muscles and reduces the effects of anxiety. Eat right and get your sleep. If you’re run down, you won’t be efficient or function at the intellectual level required to get good grades, do good at work, take care of your kids. Stress degrades the first line of defense in our immune system and prolonged stress usually leads to illness.

Long Island couples therapist - getting through hard times

For more info. on counseling, contact Robin Newman, LCSW today.

Robin Newman helps couples & individuals break through barriers to achieve greater understanding, connection and intimacy.

< Watch Robin Newman on YouTube >

Imago Relationship Therapist Long Island
Couples Therapy Family Therapy Therapy • • By Robin Newman 0 Comments

Intentional Dialogue – Imago Relationship Therapy Explained

Intentional Dialogue – Imago Relationship Therapy Explained by Robin Newman, LCSW

Every couple starts off the same way with an intentional dialogue: Knee to Knee. Heart to Heart. Eye to Eye.

You must face each other during an important dialogue. It’s very important to check in. Ask if now is a good time to talk with your partner. And if it isn’t, make an appointment. Remember to speak in the “I” and not in the “You.” One topic should only be used. It shouldn’t be a laundry list of things that are going wrong. Below are the key steps with intentional dialogue.

MIRRORING

Once your partner is done speaking to you, you mirror back what they have said. This isn’t only good for the sender to hear, but it’s also good for the receiver, to make sure that they heard and comprehended the message as intended from the sender.

SUMMARY

The receiver then summarizes what their partner said.

VALIDATION

You don’t have to let go of what you believe to validate someone else’s feelings. You are two separate people. Understand what the validation does. Hearing that your partner “gets it.”

EMPATHY

Understand how that makes your partner feel. Step into their shoes for a second and really try to see it through their lens.

Then you two switch from being the sender to the receiver, and vice versa.

The truth of any situation sort of sits in the middle.. Feelings are not facts. So remember, clear communication is absolutely necessary to understand your partner’s feelings and thoughts.

ROBIN NEWMAN, LCSW-R, PC
Individual, Couples & Family Therapist

The Huntington Relationship & Therapy Center
148 East Main Street Huntington, NY 11743

“My approach towards couples is oriented not only towards solving the problems the couple is facing, but to revive the feeling of love and affection they have towards each other.”

For more information on counseling, contact Robin Newman today.

Intentional Dialogue - Long Island couples' therapistRobin Newman helps couples break through barriers to achieve greater understanding, connection and intimacy.

therapistlongisland@gmail.com

(631) 421-4701

< Watch Robin Newman on YouTube >

communication process of Imago relationship therapy
Couples Therapy Family Therapy Workshops • • By Robin Newman 0 Comments

The communication process of Imago relationship therapy

Learn the communication process of Imago relationship therapy at our couples workshops located in Huntington – Long Island, NY.

So we break for lunch for an hour to maybe an hour and a half depending on how much material we have gone through and because we all have different ways of learning, we show videos in order to help you to understand more effectively, as examples of how we tend to communicate with each other.

I try to incorporate getting up and moving as much as possible and stretching because we’re sitting for a few hours but everybody has remarked on how the day flies. When we’re finally finished on Sunday, people don’t want to leave and that just makes me feel like I did what I was supposed to do, which was really help the couples and assist them in learning the communication process of Imago relationship therapy – in particular, the intentional dialogue, and just the energy that Don and I bring into the space.

I feel very blessed.

ROBIN NEWMAN, LCSW-R, PC
Individual, Couples & Family Therapist

To learn more about the communication process of Imago relationship therapy or our workshops, please contact me: 631-421-4701

To find the next couples workshop dates, click here.

couples workshop JAN 26 & 27, 2019
Couples Therapy Family Therapy Social Work Therapy • • By Robin Newman 1 Comment

“Selective Abstraction”

Selective Abstraction – another cognitive error.

Licensed social worker, Robin Newman, LCSW, speaking about selective abstraction at her class at Adelphi University, Graduate School of Social Work

ONE DETAIL can get taken out of context between two people – the story goes south and becomes a total experience. Don’t let this small detail get in the way of the bigger picture!

We invite you to our Long Island couples workshop!

GETTING THE LOVE YOU WANT
LONG ISLAND COUPLES WORKSHOP

January 26 & 27, 2019
10-7:30 / 10-6:00

Spice Up Your Relationship & Reconnect With Your Partner

Make a good relationship better, heal a broken relationship, or prevent a new relationship from potential pitfalls. This workshop can make all the difference!

The Huntington Relationship & Therapy Center
148 East Main Street Huntington, NY 11743
(631) 421-4701

“My approach towards couples is oriented not only towards solving the problems the couple is facing, but to revive the feeling of love and affection they have towards each other.”

ABOUT ROBIN NEWMAN

Couples Therapy Family Therapy • • By Robin Newman 0 Comments

In our search to create meaning in our relationships with our significant others, we decide that perhaps children will connect us intimately.

What saddens me about our culture, is that we tend to take our children as hostages.

Search for Meaning by Having KidsIn our search to create meaning in our relationships with our significant others, we decide that perhaps children will connect us intimately. So we have a few. We wait and wait for the instant gratification of our connection to resume or happen. What’s so sad is that it doesn’t and now there are children involved in the same dynamic that the couple created.

Over the years, I have heard from so many couples who knew it wasn’t working and had children anyway.

Some are tired and don’t want to do the work. They will call me a few times and reach out but decide that, putting the time and effort into their relationship isn’t worth it at this point. So, we end up with more carnage by inflicting our poor way of communicating in our marriage onto our children. We are their role models, their compass in the storm.

We enable them to lose their way.

Then we wonder, “why did they choose the partner that they did”?

< Watch Robin Newman, LCSW on YouTube >

Thich Nhat Hahn - blaming has no positive effect at all
Couples Therapy Family Therapy Individual Therapy Relationship Tips • • • • • By Robin Newman 0 Comments

Relationship Tip #17: Blaming has no positive effect at all.

“Blaming has no positive effect at all, nor does trying to persuade using reasoning and arguments. That is my experience. No blame, no reasoning, no argument, just understanding.”

Long Island couples therapist

Relationship Tip #17:  This quote from Buddhist monk Thich Nhat Hanh reminds us that blaming another person does not work; what works is understanding the other.

I find it helps to remember ~ whatever your partner says or does makes sense to him or her, even if it makes no sense to you.

PRIVATE WEEKEND COUPLES’ INTENSIVE WORKSHOPS WITH ROBIN & DON @ THE HUNTINGTON RELATIONSHIP CENTER

Spice Up Your Relationship & Reconnect With Your Partner

For inquiries / to book a couples’ intensive session:

Couples’ counseling intensives are 1 1/2 days on the weekend in Huntington, New York. Treated as a “boot camp” for couples who wish to improve communication, intimacy, and understanding. Robin & Don teach couples specific communication techniques that will allow both people to feel safe and connected as they talk about their problems, instead of entering the painful “power struggle”.

Get professional counseling from a licensed therapist in this boot camp weekend couples workshop!

GETTING THE LOVE YOU WANT: The New York Times bestselling guide to transforming an intimate relationship into a lasting source of love & companionship.
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baggage in relationships

How we bring baggage into our relationships.

Emotional baggage is what people often carry into relationships. Simply put, baggage is the collection of unpleasant memories …