Tag: anxiety

individual counseling depression / anxiety Long Island

How we feed into our depression / anxiety

Another question that is often asked to me when people are calling me up to sort of screen me to see if I’m the right fit is they’ll ask me, how I work with their depression / anxiety?

I try to approach it as a relational model.

I do Cognitive Behavioral Therapy as well.

Most people that are coming to me individually, they are coming in because from a relational perspective, they feel immobilized. They are in a relationship. They want to blame their parents, spouse, children, boss, etc.. whoever it is.

I try to create a construct for them to look at how are YOU feeding into the problem?

How are you making yourself the victim vs. the victor?

We try to focus on being curious again and filled with wonder about how do I participate in this relational dance as opposed to looking to blame, shame, or throw it off on someone else.

Let’s face it: we all want to completely control our outcomes in everything.

I think if we can spend less time thinking about what other people may be thinking, and spend more time thinking about what WE can do to change or shift the outcome, we’ll usually find a favorable outcome.

If there isn’t a favorable outcome, then you have the opportunity to look at the situation and say, ok so, now what do I do with the situation now that this person is not accepting the boundaries that I’ve expressed to them?

Individual counseling is meant to help people with emotional & other mental health issues such as depression / anxiety, which can range in severity / intensity. Get the help you need in a 100% safe space.

Contact Robin for additional information on therapy sessions.

For other videos of Robin Newman, watch on YouTube!

anger management counseling

Anger Management: Symptoms & Triggers

Anger is a natural response humans have to certain situations, and it should in no way be something we’re ashamed of. However, having troubles controlling your anger can be an issue. Problems with anger management, often called having “anger issues,” only becomes a problem when you can no longer control it.

Anger shows itself as saying or doing things that harm you or others around you.

Uncontrolled anger can physically and emotionally harm you if you do not recognize or take steps to reduce it, and the first step is to identify if you have this problem.

There’s many different cues to help identify if you struggle with anger.

Common behaviors can include:

  • struggling to compromise in an argument or meeting
  • having difficulties expressing emotions in a calm manner
  • ignoring others when angry
  • isolation
  • self-harm
  • shouting / cussing
  • physical violence
  • substance abuse or addiction.

Not all of these immediately point to troubles with anger management, but a few paired together could be a sign that you might have trouble with it.

The next step is to find out what triggers these emotions.

Triggers can stem from mental illness, short term triggers, and/or individual triggers. Mental illness like depression, OCD, and substance abuse can bring forth anger issues which link to anxiety, meaning this is one of the most important triggers to nip in the bud.

Short term triggers can include injustices, feeling you are not being heard, remembering a past trauma, or losing patience. These are common triggers for feeling upset in general, but they could also be amplified if you have problems with anger.

Lastly, we all have individual triggers, examples of such include political views, religious beliefs, or other subject matters that relate to who we are. It is helpful to identify these so that we can react calmly in these situations.

Anger is unhealthy for many reasons, including mental and physical illnesses.

Misdirected or unexpressed anger can lead to poor cardiovascular health and/or heart disease. Anger and stress can also lead to higher blood pressure, which can cause a blood clot or bleeding within the brain. You are three times more likely to endure this bleeding or a stroke in the hours after an outburst, putting you at risk for a fatal incident. Lastly, when you are angry, you release stress hormones, which can affect your airways and lungs and can lead to poor respiratory health.

Because of both the physical & mental stress anger brings, it’s important to reduce outbursts.

There are some strategies you can implement to help with this. First, recognizing when you are upset so that you can de-escalate the situation.

Next, trying to think before you react. This gives you time to process what the best reaction could be to benefit not only you but the people around you.

It can also be helpful to talk to people about your situation. You could talk to others who are not involved about what you are going through or feeling at the moment.

Many people exercise in their spare time, and this releases chemicals that make you feel happy and refreshed. If you enjoy exercise this may be a viable solution.

You can also practice being more assertive, helping to express your opinion in a calm and efficient way to the people around you.

Lastly, you can use apps for peer support, mindfulness, and relaxation. There are many peer support groups and platforms where people share their own experiences and journeys, many meditation apps that can help reduce stress, and overall just many apps that can help with relaxation such as white noises, calming games, and more.

anger management counseling Long Island

If you feel that you are overwhelmed by your struggles and need professional support, consider talking to a counselor.

For more info. on anger management counseling, contact Robin Newman, LCSW today.

Robin Newman, social worker & owner of the Huntington Relationship Center in Long Island, NY.

anxiety counselor NY

Steps to Combat Anxiety

Steps to Combat Anxiety:  The experts say that we are all suffering from anxiety right now and I believe them. It may manifest itself in different ways for different people, but we all feel it.

Sometimes, things are so obvious that we think we shouldn’t even have to say it, but during times of great stress, we do need it said; We need it to be said over & over. So here’s what you (and I) need to do:

1. Go to bed – Don’t stay up all night. Turn the devices off and get as much sleep as possible.

2. Exercise – I know the gym is closed, but there are plenty of ways to exercise at home or outside. Just try going up and down the stairs 10 times in a row at the very least.

3. Eat well – Fight the urge to eat all the time. Eat things that are good for you. Try to eat on a normal schedule. This will help you sleep better too.

4. Get some solitude – You need to get some alone time with your thoughts if you are around a group constantly. You need to just take a couple of deep breaths and try to relax.

5. Connect with friends – We are all social creatures. Loneliness is an epidemic in our culture today. Reach out to your friends and family. Spend some time on the phone or Facetime or Skype with them.

Even after doing all these things, you may still feel out of sorts. It’s ok, we’re all in this together. I’m here to help if you need someone to listen.

For more info. on counseling, contact Robin Newman, LCSW today.

(631) 421-4701  < Watch Robin Newman on YouTube >
stay in connection - Huntington Relationship Therapy

Stay in connection 2020

Stay in connection 2020 – Huntington Relationship Center – Imago Relationship Therapy

Humans are social animals: We crave feeling supported, valued and connected.

Research points to the benefits of social connection: in one compelling study, a key difference between very happy people and less happy people was good relationships.

Communicate to help manage anxiety and stress.

During this time of sheltering in place / being quarantined under the same roof, it’s highly possible that stress, anxiety and depression might start to get the best of us. If it happens to you, know that it’s perfectly normal, especially under these chaotic circumstances.

That’s why it’s so important to stay in connection during these uncertain times. No one should struggle alone. If you find that you could use someone to talk to or you know someone who is in need of assistance, contact the Huntington Relationship Center today.

As a Long Island social worker, Robin welcomes couples, families, and individuals to her office:
148 East Main Street (Suite 102) Huntington, NY 11743.

Long Island couples therapist - getting through hard times

For more info. on counseling, contact Robin Newman, LCSW today.

Robin Newman helps individuals and couples break through barriers to achieve greater understanding, connection and intimacy. (631) 421-4701

< Watch Robin Newman on YouTube >

Heightened Stress in 2020 - Counseling Services for NYers - Robin Newman, LCSW

Heightened Stress in 2020 – Counseling for NYers

Heightened Stress in 2020 – Counseling Services for NYers – Robin Newman, LCSW

Invest In Your Love

A relationship goes through numerous phases during its life cycle, and it’s obvious for it to have a few rough patches. The strength of a relationship is reflected in how couples deal with the rough patches and move ahead. During these stressful times, counseling can be very helpful.

Surviving Heightened Stress in 2020:

Maintain your emotional support system. If you don’t have any, find a licensed therapist who will be that for you. These are the people you can vent your frustration with and share your successes with.

Talking about what’s happening to you is the best way to defuse your feelings and symptoms. Allow yourself to cry. It releases feelings and tension. Get feedback and advice from a professional NY counselor.

Value and protect yourself. Try to exercise. Exercise releases tension in the muscles and reduces the effects of anxiety. Eat right and get your sleep. If you’re run down, you won’t be efficient or function at the intellectual level required to get good grades, do good at work, take care of your kids. Stress degrades the first line of defense in our immune system and prolonged stress usually leads to illness.

Long Island couples therapist - getting through hard times

For more info. on counseling, contact Robin Newman, LCSW today.

Robin Newman helps couples & individuals break through barriers to achieve greater understanding, connection and intimacy.

< Watch Robin Newman on YouTube >

Prayer for Gratitude with Robin Newman

Prayer for Gratitude during Coronavirus

I found something that is very touching that I’d thought I would share with you in order to help you get through today. It’s a prayer for gratitude. Also, after I read this, I’m going to share ways to keep yourself from getting less anxious.

If you find that you are getting very anxious during these times, the best thing for you to do is provide some structure to your day. As I’ve said to a few patients that I’ve seen virtually lately, getting out of the bed in the morning and putting the TV on right away is not a good thing to do. It’s really important to get up, maybe do a meditation, maybe pray for gratitude, make a gratitude journal for the things you are grateful for this time when you are at home. Then start your day after writing in a gratitude journal to taking a walk outside or some kind of exercise. But really, limit your TV intake to 15-20 minutes of news a day. Save entertainment for later in the day. Try to find little projects to do because we’re strapped in for the long haul right now, and it’s going to get worse before it gets better.

Just know that you are strong and you can do this.

Robin NewmanRemote video counseling sessions with Robin Newman

Due to the current status of things here on Long Island, Robin Newman, LCSW, is offering virtual therapy sessions until we’re all able to see one another again face to face. For more information, contact Robin today.

If you liked this prayer for gratitude, show Robin some love on Facebook!

couples counseling - communication techniques

Listening To Your Partner With Neutrality

Robin Newman and David Weber discuss how they see couples shut down communicating with one another, and how it leads to less …

David Weber - Holistic Counseling Long Island

Imago relationship therapists on Long Island discuss the benefits of Imago therapy.

Imago relationship therapists, Robin Newman and David Weber, both practicing on Long Island, discuss some of the benefits …

roles in relationships

Mens’ vs. Womens’ Roles in Relationships

Long Island Imago Relationship Therapists discuss the bigger issues counseling couples – the differences between mens’ …