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Relationship Tip #17: Blaming has no positive effect at all.
“Blaming has no positive effect at all, nor does trying to persuade using reasoning and arguments. That is my experience. No blame, no reasoning, no argument, just understanding.” Relationship Tip #17: This quote from Buddhist monk Thich Nhat Hanh reminds us that blaming another person does not work; what works is understanding the other. I…
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Appreciations
Give your partner one appreciation every day. So often people tell me that they don’t feel appreciated by their spouse. Tell your partner how much you appreciate something nice or thoughtful that they did for you today. Appreciations can help us to feel emotionally safe with each other. Remember that an appreciation a day can…
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Tip of the month
If you have something important that you want to discuss with your spouse or partner, asking, “Is now a good time to talk?” can make a big difference. It gives the other person a “heads up” that you want their undivided attention, that this is important to you, that you really want them to listen…
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Fix My Partner
So many couples come into couples therapy with the attitude of “just fix my partner.” They don’t look at how they participate in the dance of intimacy. Many will ask “what can I do to make this work?” What sometimes troubles me are the few who are unwilling to do their homework when I assign…
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INVEST IN YOUR LOVE
What many couples don’t realize is that divorce is very expensive. If money is spent on good couples therapy, it actually is more cost effective. That’s what I love about Imago Relationship Therapy – it gets right to the heart of the matter. I think the thing that saddens me the most is when a…