Tag: <span>Imago Relationship Therapist</span>

intentional dialogue in Imago Relationship Therapy

Intentional Dialogue

The Intentional Dialogue in Imago Relationship Therapy with Robin Newman, Therapist in Long Island

Tied Up In Knots…

Try to remember this the next time a fight has you tied up in knots.

The best argument has no winner, and nobody gets blamed.

For the best argument is a dialogue, an intentional dialogue, heated perhaps, needled sometimes with anger no doubt, difficult always, between two people whose positions on a given issue are passionately different.

That two people have different opinions about the same thing, is the measure of their uniqueness.

That they express their differences, is a measure of their courage.

That they are willing to listen to someone else’s position, is a measure of their maturity.

And that they are willing to arrive at a solution, is a measure of the strength of their relationship.

An argument is a forum for a passionate dialogue, not a battleground, or the occasion for a firing squad.

The winner of the truly successful argument is never an individual, but the relationship itself.

So much said in a simple amount of prose. When you think about it, it opens up the question of, what is the intentional dialogue in Imago? And how wonderful a tool to be able to use to talk things out, to understand that two opinions can exist in the same space and both are right. And to be able to see your partner’s / family member’s perception through their eyes. To really give them empathy and validation for those feelings.

This really talks about what the Intentional Dialogue in Imago Relationship Therapy is truly about.

Robin Newman, LCSW-R, PC

Imago Relationship Therapist – Individual, Couples & Family Counseling

Follow The Huntington Relationship Center on YouTube

getting the love you want weekend workshop couples therapy long island 2022

Getting The Love You Want Couples Workshop 2022

Robin Newman licensed clinical social worker Long Island, marriage counselor

We’re excited to share with you our new dates for our weekend couples counseling workshop, ‘Getting The Love You Want’ in Long Island, New York.

Taking place in Huntington, NY, this intensive couples workshop gets right into it, no messing around. Robin Newman, Imago Relationship Therapist, Social Worker & Owner of the Huntington Relationship Center will be facilitating the event along with her husband, Don.

September 17 & 18, 2022
10 am – 6 pm

Couples’ counseling workshops are 2 days on the weekend in Huntington, New York.

Treated as a “bootcamp” for couples who wish to improve communication, intimacy, and understanding. Robin & Don teach couples specific communication techniques that will allow both people to feel safe and connected as they talk about their problems, instead of entering the painful “power struggle”.

This workshop is designed for married & single couples of all gender & sexual orientations.

Mountainside Huntington

The Getting The Love You Want Workshop will be taking place at:

Mountainside Huntington

141 E. Main Street, Huntington, NY 11743

Mountainside Huntington

Mountainside Huntington is conveniently located in Long Island, New York, and is within easy commuting distance for residents in Suffolk County and Nassau County.

$975.00 per couple

Sign up today to secure your spot: We have limited space since couples break off into private rooms at points to talk privately.

What you will discover in a Getting the Love You Want workshop for couples:

  • Why the very qualities that attracted you to each other now often drive you crazy.
  • How to get to the root of your problems and learn how to dissolve them.
  • How to successfully communicate your frustrations & desires to get your needs met.
  • How you and your partner can express your love and appreciation in ways that work for both of you.
  • Greater compassion and understanding – of both yourself and your partner.
  • How to create fun, romance, passion, and intimacy.
  • How to re-establish the excitement and intimacy of your first months or years together.
  • How to achieve growth and lasting fulfillment – for both of you.

Get professional counseling from a licensed therapist in this intensive weekend couples workshop right here in Long Island, New York

“We are born in relationship, we are wounded in relationship, and we can be healed in relationship.”

Have Questions?

Call Robin Newman for additional information on this couples workshop (631) 421-4701

Ready to Sign Up?

Payments for the workshop are made via Venmo to Robin Newman, LCSW

Phil S. testimonial of Robin Newman

Review about Robin Newman

“This review could literally be 10 pages long: one page for every year that I have known her both professionally and personally…

Professionally, Robin is top notch. I find her to be an open-minded, straight-talking, no BS, problem solving, truth warrior. She will be the most sensitive, caring, concerned, human being you will find, and treat you as if you were from her own family.

But, be warned! If you are not ready to hear hard truths, have someone eloquently ask you to look in the mirror and be held accountable for your own actions and in pursuit of meaningful change to improve your life – or you would rather have some A-typical, battery operated, drone of a hollow, empty, damaged “therapist” ask you, “So, how does that make YOU feel,” you are going to the wrong office.

She is a sharp, quick witted, hard core, battle tested, successful entrepreneur, athlete, and professional wellness expert that will sit you down and craft a success strategy out of your current challenges and you will move forward with reckless abandon, strength, confidence, self-assuredness, and most importantly, centered in your unique place of personal peace and tranquility.

Personally, I have seldom found someone more interested in listening to my every word and allowing me to vent out my frustrations without judgment. She is not only a trusted colleague in my professional practices but a dependable friend when the chips have been down. Few will raise their voice when the time comes for mistruths, slander, and gossip to be called out. But, if Robin is your friend, rest assured she will not back down from someone who thinks they can, without witness, take your name in vain!

She will be your guardian angel. She walks in light. She will be your best friend, your most trusted professional, and will feel like your pseudo mother, sister, aunt, or wife. If you need help, by the grace of God, your prayers have been answered and Robin delivered unto you.

Be at peace knowing that she is in your corner. There will never be a question of that. As sure as the sun rises in the east, Robin will be your best advocate and cheerleader for a life worth living.”

Testimonial about Robin Newman left by Phil S.

imago relationship therapy for individuals long island ny

Imago Relationship Therapy for Individuals Long Island, NY

The Huntington Relationship Center offers Imago Relationship Therapy for Individuals, Couples & Families in Long Island, New York

ROBIN NEWMAN, LCSW-R, PC offers Imago relationship therapy for individuals.

Part of our problem is in how we may have been brought up. We don’t always know better, but when equipped with the right knowledge, we can break our learned behaviors and have a better quality of life through better relationships.

The Huntington Relationship & Therapy Center
148 East Main Street Huntington, NY 11743
(631) 421-4701

ABOUT ROBIN NEWMAN:

I am a licensed clinical social worker, Imago relationship therapist, as well as an adjunct professor at the Graduate School of Social Work at Adelphi University. I’m a contributing therapist to Ladies Home Journal Magazine, “Can This Marriage Be Saved?” and the online magazine “Parenting Special Needs, Relationship Rescue”.

I work with couples, families and individuals. I’m successful in guiding my patients through anxiety, depression, self-esteem challenges, addictions, and/or family conflicts.

The key for me is always in the patient who has the courage and openness to heal. We all have wounds that can hold us back from creating satisfying relationships. It is a privilege and a blessing to be invited into the lives of others and assist them in having a more productive and healed life.

Robin Newman, Licensed Clinical Social Worker Long Island therapists

Are therapists paid to agree with you?

Robin Newman, Imago relationship therapist: Are therapists paid to agree with you?

I often get the question if I ever ‘agree’ with my clients.

So, here’s my answer to that:

I will always agree with blatant injustice. But, I feel that if I agree completely, I’m letting the person off the hook of looking at what their duplicity is. What they are doing to participate in the relationship / situation that they are in?

If I just agree, then how am I helping them to see and to prevent the next ‘set up’ because I always say to people that things come in different disguises.

So if I just agree with you saying he / she is a jackass, etc. and then you get into a new relationship with someone else and you’re doing the same things again. How is that helping you?

I’m going to be more in the realm of saying, yeah, that wasn’t such a great thing that he / she did to you, but what did you to participate? What patterns are you following / stuck in? What kinds of people are you choosing to surround yourself with to find yourself still getting into these situations?

For more info. on counseling, contact Robin Newman, LCSW

Robin Newman, social worker & owner of the Huntington Relationship Center in Long Island, NY.

Robin Newman, LCSW-R, PC THE HUNTINGTON RELATIONSHIP CENTER

Imago Relationship Therapists – Individual, Couples & Family Counseling

148 East Main Street (Suite 102) Huntington, NY 11743 (631) 421-4701

imago relationship therapy NY

The Imago Dialogue for Couples

If you feel that your relationship is lacking intimacy, I highly encourage you to look into the Imago Dialogue. As an Imago Relationship Therapist, I help guide couples who struggle for re-connection to find their way, develop better communication skills, and fully be heard and understood. Once this happens, couples open up, their hearts open, and their relationships are revived with a new hope and feeling of intimacy with one another.

Effective communication is really the lubrication to your relationship. It matters to both partners to have the freedom and safety to express their concerns/resentments/issues and fully be heard.

The Imago Dialogue

In the Imago Dialogue, both partners agree to a basic ground rule: one person talks at a time.

There is one person who is speaking (aka sending) and another who is listening (aka receiving).

It’s when you’re in the role of Listener/Receiver that you will be doing the 3 steps of Imago Dialogue which are:

• Mirroring
• Validation
• Empathy

STEP 1: MIRROR

When your partner pauses, or perhaps when you have asked them to pause, you will repeat back exactly everything you heard them say. You will mirror without analyzing, critiquing, modifying or responding.

EXAMPLE: “If I got it right, I heard you say…” and then ask the Speaker/Sender if there’s more they’d like to add to what they said: “Is there anything else you want to add/say?”

STEP 2: VALIDATE

After giving the Sender as many opportunities to “add more” as needed, once the Sender says there is no more, the Receiver attempts to validate what the Sender said. The Sender will validate if what they are hearing back from you is making logical sense to them – if they feel you got the message. If the Sender feels that you didn’t understand what they’ve told you, you simply share what does make sense to you, and then ask the Sender to say more about the parts that don’t.

EXAMPLE: “This makes sense to me because…” or “That makes sense, I can see where…”

Ask for clarification:  “This part makes sense, but help me understand this, can you say more?”

STEP 3: EMPATHIZE

In the final step, the Receiver takes a guess as to what they imagine the Sender might be feeling with regard to what they have been saying. If the Sender has already said how they feel, then the Receiver can simply reflect this back once more. If the Receiver can think of an additional way their partner might be feeling, this is where they add that.

When sending empathy, it is fine to say something such as:  “I can imagine you feel like …. (you’re the only one working on our relationship).” However, it’s important to know that once the word “like” comes into play, what’s being expressed is a thought, not a feeling. The best way we have come to distinguish the difference between a thought and a feeling, is that a feeling can generally be described in a few words: happy, excited, safe, cared for, hurt, frustrated, scared. Try to include feeling words if you can. Doing so, especially when lucky enough to hit the proverbial nail on the head, will often bring a look of recognition and joy to your partner’s face faster than anything else you could say.

EXAMPLE:  “I can imagine you might be feeling drained from this…”

Now that the Sender has said all they have to say and the Receiver has mirrored, validated and empathized, the whole process reverses. Partners trade places, but the new Sender does not start a new topic, rather s/he responds to what the first Sender said. The Receiver now gets their turn to respond with whatever came up for them while the first partner was sending.

If you are interested in learning more about using Imago Dialogue for your relationship, contact Robin Newman, LCSW.

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Adelphi University

Robin Newman, Senior Adjunct Faculty Member at the Adelphi School of Social Work

Robin Newman, LCSW in Huntington, NY is now a Senior Adjunct Faculty Member at the Adelphi School of Social Work. She continues educating Long Island students in social work and counseling.

Senior Adjunct Faculty Member at Adelphi University

For clips of Robin Newman at Adelphi, see below, or follow Robin on YouTube:

Long Island counseling

Irrational Beliefs Theory – The Becks Model – Underlying Schema

Selective Abstraction – another cognitive error.

The role of the Narrative Therapist

Schema-Focused Cognitive Therapy – Treatment for Lifelong Patterns

romantic love

Romantic Love Is Not An Illusion

Romantic Love Is Not An Illusion ~ Getting The Love You Want Sept. 2019 Workshop ~ Long Island, NY

Romantic love is not an illusion.

We’re our highest selves when we let go of defenses. We think the person who we’re falling in love with is “giving” us these feelings, but actually, it’s our body that is producing them. We are in love with feeling alive. We are in love with the experience of living with an open heart. We are in love with love! And we think it will never end. Who we are in romantic love is not an illusion, but who we really are when we let go of our defenses. We get in touch with the person we were always meant to be.

GETTING THE LOVE YOU WANT COUPLES WORKSHOPS

The New York Times bestselling guide to transforming an intimate relationship into a lasting source of love & companionship.

Is your relationship starving for affection, romance & passion?

Do you wish to deepen the relationship, the closeness & the intimacy that once made it so special?

Does it seem like you can’t stop the cycle of anger, blame, arguments & withdrawal?

Do you consistently feel unheard?

Do you wish you argued less & talked more?

Well, it’s time to make important changes in your relationship!

Discover what really lies beneath triggered reactions in romantic partnerships and how to make lasting change. Move into more conscious connection and have the relationship of your dreams.

Learn to effectively communicate, work through conflicts in a skilled way, and be genuinely affectionate with each other.

Long Island couples therapist - getting through hard times

For more info. on couples counseling, contact Robin Newman, LCSW today.

Robin Newman helps couples break through barriers to achieve greater understanding, connection and intimacy.

(631) 421-4701

< Watch Robin Newman on YouTube >

Imago Relationship Therapist Long Island

Intentional Dialogue – Imago Relationship Therapy Explained

Intentional Dialogue – Imago Relationship Therapy Explained by Robin Newman, LCSW

Every couple starts off the same way with an intentional dialogue: Knee to Knee. Heart to Heart. Eye to Eye.

You must face each other during an important dialogue. It’s very important to check in. Ask if now is a good time to talk with your partner. And if it isn’t, make an appointment. Remember to speak in the “I” and not in the “You.” One topic should only be used. It shouldn’t be a laundry list of things that are going wrong. Below are the key steps with intentional dialogue.

MIRRORING

Once your partner is done speaking to you, you mirror back what they have said. This isn’t only good for the sender to hear, but it’s also good for the receiver, to make sure that they heard and comprehended the message as intended from the sender.

SUMMARY

The receiver then summarizes what their partner said.

VALIDATION

You don’t have to let go of what you believe to validate someone else’s feelings. You are two separate people. Understand what the validation does. Hearing that your partner “gets it.”

EMPATHY

Understand how that makes your partner feel. Step into their shoes for a second and really try to see it through their lens.

Then you two switch from being the sender to the receiver, and vice versa.

The truth of any situation sort of sits in the middle.. Feelings are not facts. So remember, clear communication is absolutely necessary to understand your partner’s feelings and thoughts.

ROBIN NEWMAN, LCSW-R, PC
Individual, Couples & Family Therapist

The Huntington Relationship & Therapy Center
148 East Main Street Huntington, NY 11743

“My approach towards couples is oriented not only towards solving the problems the couple is facing, but to revive the feeling of love and affection they have towards each other.”

For more information on counseling, contact Robin Newman today.

Intentional Dialogue - Long Island couples' therapistRobin Newman helps couples break through barriers to achieve greater understanding, connection and intimacy.

therapistlongisland@gmail.com

(631) 421-4701

< Watch Robin Newman on YouTube >

couples workshop JAN 26 & 27, 2019

“Selective Abstraction”

Selective Abstraction – another cognitive error.

Licensed social worker, Robin Newman, LCSW, speaking about selective abstraction at her class at Adelphi University, Graduate School of Social Work

ONE DETAIL can get taken out of context between two people – the story goes south and becomes a total experience. Don’t let this small detail get in the way of the bigger picture!

We invite you to our Long Island couples workshop!

GETTING THE LOVE YOU WANT
LONG ISLAND COUPLES WORKSHOP

January 26 & 27, 2019
10-7:30 / 10-6:00

Spice Up Your Relationship & Reconnect With Your Partner

Make a good relationship better, heal a broken relationship, or prevent a new relationship from potential pitfalls. This workshop can make all the difference!

The Huntington Relationship & Therapy Center
148 East Main Street Huntington, NY 11743
(631) 421-4701

“My approach towards couples is oriented not only towards solving the problems the couple is facing, but to revive the feeling of love and affection they have towards each other.”

ABOUT ROBIN NEWMAN

intentional dialogue in Imago Relationship Therapy

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getting the love you want weekend workshop couples therapy long island 2022

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relationship issues

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