Tag: partners

Our partners think & love differently from us - NY Couples Workshops - Getting The Love You Want

Our partners think & love differently from us

Not Like You: our partners think & love differently from us – NY Couples Workshop – Getting The Love You Want


Not like you. The person you love won’t look at love or your relationship in exactly the same way that you do. He or she may have very different feelings about how it should be conducted, how you should argue, how and when to make love, even what your relationship means. For your darling, the most important thing about loving you may be that you’re there every day, every night for them to come home to. While for you, the specific kinds of attention you receive: sweet words and flowers, or anniversary presents may mean more than anything else.

You may handle crises in totally different ways. He may go to the gym to work out or you may talk on the phone for hours with your best friend. Understanding that your beloved may not feel the same way and in some sense may not even occupy sometimes, the same relationship as you do, is one of the greatest opportunities for growth in any intimate relationship.

I chose this for a reason because in Imago, we always say that two perceptions, two opinions can exist in the same space. Both are right. As a couple, you are not symbiotic. You are connected, but you do not finish and stop each other’s sentences thinking the same exact way. You may at times be on the same wavelength, but your partner is their own person, as are you.

If you’re struggling figuring out where you are in your relationship, trying to be heard, trying to get validated, trying to learn how to validate, trying to see how our partners think & love differently from us, please attend one of our workshops Getting The Love You Want.

GTLYW Workshop Feb 21 & 22, 2020

Are we really drawn to partners like our parents?

Couples Workshop February 2020: Are we really drawn to partners like our parents?

Our parents’ business: No person is without a history or context. We are all living out untold, unfinished emotional legacies passed down to us by our parents as conscious discovering individuals. We must live our way through all the things they have not resolved until having come to the place where we have transformed their tragedies and our childhoods. We can finally emerge as ourselves. How do we emerge as ourselves?

Drawn to partners like our parents.

Typically, we are drawn to people that remind us unconsciously of our caregivers. So in a way, we’re trying to push forward to connect with some sort of resolution of whatever it is that hurt us. What is your mother’s unresolved problem? What is your father’s unresolved issue? How have you taken on their unfinished business?

Give your parents’ problems back to them by looking into your future and focusing on what you need to accomplish in your own life.

It’s not your parents’ fault that they did to you what their parents did to them. We always say that in Imago Relationship Therapy. Your parents did the best job they could. But how do we stop ourselves from recreating fractures in relationships that they may have had with one another?

And with this, we’d like to invite you to our next workshop – Getting The Love You Want is like a relationship boot camp for two days. Here is where you learn to see yourself and your partner in a true light and new perspective. Learn to communicate effectively and transform your relationship into a powerful connection with one another.

Don and I very excited to be holding the next Getting The Love You Want couples workshop in Melville, NY on February 21st & 22nd.

Invest In Your Love

A relationship goes through numerous phases during its life cycle, and it’s obvious for it to have a few rough patches. The strength of a relationship is reflected in how couples deal with the rough patches and move ahead.

For more info. on couples counseling, contact Robin Newman today.

Long Island couples therapist: drawn to partners like our parentsRobin Newman helps couples break through barriers to achieve greater understanding, connection and intimacy.


(631) 421-4701

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